Keeping Your Child Safe & Encouraging Better Behaviour

The two following booklets are provided by NSPCC and are free to view online.

The information is easy to read and very useful especially during the early days of the au pair placement. Therefore, why not refer your au pair to the page or have a read through together with her/him.

Keeping Your Child Safe:

“How do you keep children safe outside the home? How can you keep your toddler safe if they tend to wander off? What should you tell your child to do if they get lost? How do you make sure that your children are safe when taking part in activities in the local community? What should you do if you see a distressed child?

This booklet offers practical advice to parents and carers, encouraging them to think about how they can make the world a safer place for children. Includes information on what questions to ask when choosing after and out of school activities.”

http://www.nspcc.org.uk/Inform/publications/Downloads/outalone_wdf48089.pdf

Encouraging Better Behaviour:

“A practical guide to positive parenting” , why does a child misbehave & how to react,  guide to positive discipline. A paper copy is provided as part of our family welcome pack.

http://www.nspcc.org.uk/Inform/publications/Downloads/encouragingbetterbehaviour_wdf48121.pdf

Source: NSPCC

Au Pair Driving in the UK

If you need your Au Pair to be able to drive you are responsible for arranging car insurance. Check the age you can afford to insure prior to choosing an Au pair and also check the type of licence – for rules on driving in UK, go to http://www.dvla.gov.uk/

Please note that if you need a driver you need to be aware that an Au Pair’s driving ability may be an unknown quantity. Even if the Au Pair says that they have been driving for 5 years, they may have passed their test 5 years ago and not driven a car since; so you need to be sure of their driving ability before accepting them as your Au Pair. To help, in the Au Pair application process we ask for basic information such as: How often do you drive? What types of roads do you drive on – motorway, town, city, countryside? Have you had any accidents?

Ultimately, the decision to accept an Au Pair as a driver is your responsibility and you need to be sure that the Au pair is capable of driving – especially if you expect them to drive your children. We would suggest that once the Aupair arrives you arrange for a 2 hour driving lesson so that a qualified instructor can assess their driving ability. You may need to arrange more lessons!

Source: Rebecca Haworth-Wood

RULES FOR THE ROAD

Austria

Learning: A driving school and accompanied driving programme, with practical and theory lessons and a minimum of 3,000kms accompanied driving. Learners can start at 16 and take the test from 17.

After the test: Two years’ probation and a zero-alcohol rule. Any violations lead to an offender course and extension of probation. One year after the test, there’s a day of track training and group discussion.

Germany

Learning: Drivers can learn to drive only in professional driving schools. Learners can take the test at 17, followed by mandatory accompanied driving until 18.

After the test: Two years’ probation, extended if there are violations. Zero alcohol until 21

France

Learning: Starts at 17½ (if at a driving school) or 16 on the accompanied driving programme — a combination of a minimum of 20 hours’ driving school training, 3,000km accompanied driving, plus two three-hour feedback meetings with instructor. Minimum age for test, 18.

After the test: Three years probabtion and novice drivers must display ‘A’ driver-plates on the back of the car. They must also drive more slowly, ie, 110km on motorways, instead of 130km.

Sweden

Learning: Lessons start at 16 and the accompanying driver must take a three-hour training course. Driving test can be taken at 18.

After the test: Two years’ probation. Violations result in a suspension of the licence and driver has to retake test.

UK

Learning: Test can be taken at 17. Unlike other countries, motorway driving is not taught.

After the test: Two years’ probation, during which the licence can be revoked after obtaining six penalty points, instead of the usual 12. Driver must then retake test.

Source: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/driving/features/article6505094.ece

Photo: IanWhite/Deviantart

Information for First Time Host Families

We are currently getting a lot of questions from families considering an au pair for the first time. The economic situation has made many families re-think their children’s’ education and childcare options for after school or families with younger children are calculating the cost of the nursery or the nanny versus cheaper options such as an au pair.

To make sure we cater for ‘first timers’ the best possible way, here are some of the questions we are asked most frequently.

What are the main differences between a nanny, a child minder and an au pair?

A nanny is a childcare professional. You can expect them to know everything about handling different age groups and they are fully ‘equipped’ to care for babies also. They are unlikely to take on any household task except those directly relating to your children. They live out and come to your house to care for your children as per an agreed schedule. You pay them a salary, expect upward from £350 net per week. She is caring for your child/children only and you pay the same for 1 child or several children. School age children may be too independent for a nanny. If you want any housework done in addition to childcare, expect to pay for a regular cleaner also. Any babysitting or extra hours are extra.

BBC Section on Childcare Options

A section on BBC discussing different childcare options – including a view on having an au pair as a childcare provider.

BBC – Childcare – What’s Available?

Pros & Cons as seen in the article for an au pair placement are:

“Pros

• An au pair or mother’s help can help with light housework, taking and collecting children from school, or looking after them for short periods after school.
• An au pair or mother’s help is a ‘built-in’ babysitter, although you must agree terms and conditions for this beforehand. Don’t expect them to babysit for more than two or three nights a week.
• An au pair can help your child understand another culture.
• A good au pair or home helper can become a close friend

Cons

• It’s likely that an au pair, home helper or babysitter won’t be qualified. They won’t be registered, either.
• They aren’t suitable for full-time, sole-charge childcare.
• You may find it hard having someone else living in your house.
• They may be great play companions, but not know how to cope when the going gets tough. It’s your responsibility to make sure they know the basics of childcare and first aid, and have suitable back-up in case of emergency.
• With an au pair, there may be language or communication difficulties.
• You’ll almost certainly need to provide some emotional support for a young au pair – think of yourself at 18.”

Source: BBC

Flexible Child Care – Au Pairs for Shift Workers

An au pair can work really well in families where one or both parents work shifts, such as emergency services such as doctors, nurses, police officers and the fire brigade but also those working in the hospitality industry such as restaurants and the entertainment industry are often out in the evenings or overnight. Even those who work in the medical profession on a nine-to-five basis, sometimes have additional ‘on call’ duties.

The advantages of live-in child care are even greater for families who work shifts, as the au pair is already at their home and familiar with the children, some are even happy to provide overnight child care for night workers.

For some employees shift work means an extremely early start. In this case, the au pair can get up with the children at a normal time and get the children ready for school and take them there. Any other child care solutions, if at all they are available at such early times, usually means getting the children up much earlier then usual and dropping them of somewhere prior to school hours, which is stressful to the parent and tiring for the children.

And working late in the evening part of your working patterns, a nursery or childminder either is not available after 6pm or charges significantly extra. An au pair who is already at your home can provide the extra flexibility required.

Many au pairs are very comfortable with parents who work shifts. As long as they can attend language classes and know more or less in advance when to expect to be in charge of the children, they can be an ideal solution for working parents, especially those in shift work.

The benefit of live-in child care is that both au pair and children can go to bed at a usual time and in their own comfortable home, meaning a fresh start the next day. It really helps that the au pair is familiar with the children and with the home.

Sole charge and overnight

It is important to stress to host families that an au pair is not a professional child carer. Before you leave them in charge of children, especially those younger than school age, it is vital that you give them clear and full instruction and a settling in period before you leave them in charge of your children for long periods of time or overnight. Our handbook guide gives detailed information about how to ‘train’ your au pair.

Considering an au pair for the first time?

We provide additional support for host families who are considering an au pair for the first time. We also arrange short term placements, particularly suited as a trial but also ideal for those who are employed on short term contract and may change location after a few months.

Register with Smartaupairs

Where Au Pair?

So many au pairs like to be in a busy environment of a city or a town, as these places are generally easy to make friends with other au pairs, close to language classes and a social life. Some of the au pair favourites where we make regular placements are London & Greater London, Canterbury, Cambridge, Oxford, Bath, Brighton, Bournemouth, Portsmouth, Southampton, Liverpool, Manchester, Edinburgh, York and Harrogate.

Au pairs in the countryside or in a village usually settle very well if they have access to a car, also in their spare time, and are close to a town or city.

We also often have requests from au pairs to be in coastal towns, especially those known for good language schools such as Margate and Ramsgate. We also get requests for Hastings, Blackpool, Norfolk, trendy Brighton (again), but also the picture-postcard villages of Devon and Cornwall are popular with au pairs.

The location of the host family is often very important to an au pair, especially before arrival. We always try to explain that we try to match people, not places, but we do appreciate that the location plays a bit part, especially for some candidates.

Pictures this, a Spanish au pair, who at home can walk out of her house every evening and meet up with friends outside her front door, walk straight into town/city center and meet up with yet more young people, for example in places like our popular short break destination Barcelona, would find it hard to settle in the English countryside, where the car must be used for every journey and meetings are more likely to be planned in advance.

In general, the above applies to Spanish au pairs, Italian au pairs and Turkish au pairs the most. Also, if you have travelled to Turkey for example, you may have noticed what it would be like to live in the ‘Turkish countryside’. It is mostly empty, the main exceptions being elderly people, who continued to live in the countryside whilst the younger generation moved into town. So for a Turkish au pair, the countryside brings up pictures of old people growing vegetables, so not very appealing for an au pair experience!

In general our most flexible au pairs are our German au pairs and our Dutch au pairs. They are very open and often already speak good English. This means they are less daunted by the ‘task’ of making friends and also they tend to be confident drivers, so provided they can have use of the car, they are usually quite flexible about their location.

French au pairs from small towns, countryside or Alpine regions (!) are also usually fine with a less urban location.

We also often have au pairs who ask to be placed with a family with horses. ‘Horse au pair’ is getting more popular for girls who want to be like a live-in groom with the chance to do lots of horse riding but usually the au pairs are happiest placed in a family where they can look after children and help with the horses also. So far we placed Dutch au pairs and German au pairs with interest in horses and our Swedish au pair agency tells us that many of their candidates love riding too!

And then we have many male au pairs, also usually very flexible about the location and confident drivers. Au pair couples are mostly placed in rural locations, as these are the homes where often one au pair can help with the children and the other au pair can help in the garden and with the animals for example. They have each other for company and will be less concerned about meeting other au pairs.

Final note on location, no matter where the au pair is placed, smartaupairs will help finding au pair friends nearby. We share an online service www.aupair2aupair.com and every au pair who is placed though our service received a passport to register. This allows the au pair to search by postcode which au pairs are close and contact them to arrange a meeting. This service is shared with all member agencies from the British Au Pair Agencies Association, so we have au pairs on this service from more than 25 agencies making it a safe place to meet other au pairs, first online and then in person!

Your Au Pair Can Save You Money

How to Save on Child Care

With the recent headline in The Times a couple of days ago being ‘Families’ cash fears worst for 26 years’ and more recently how families will need to review their budget to see if they can continue to pay for school fees, as fees are accelerating at nearly twice the official rate of inflation. (Source Money Week online), I really wanted to dedicate this article to the most affordable childcare solution.

Quick Stats

£7,000-£8,000 The average annual amount parents pay for a child’s day-nursery care, according to the Daycare Trust. The average for a childminder is £7,500
£33,000 a year Total amount that families with nannies fork out for a “live-out” nanny in
London, according to specialist payroll service NannyTax

Source: The Guardian, Wednesday June 18, 2008. In Britain we are very lucky, because we speak English. There will always be young people coming to Britain to improve their English and many still look to do so by combining formal language classes whilst staying with a host family and looking after the children. This is the au pair program.

Although I never want to promote the au pair program as ‘cheap childcare’ it is easy to see that it is indeed the most affordable paid childcare solution available in Britain. So, if you are reviewing your childcare budget, please read on, hosting an au pair is not for everybody and you certainly should think twice if you are choosing an au pair ONLY on the basis that it is cheaper than your current child care solution.

Key areas where an au pair can save you money are:

• Help with homework instead of after school clubs and extra lessons
• Help with music practise, thus reducing the hours in professional music tuition
• Sports and activities in the park, rather than in structured after school club
• Cooking and other light housework

To be a host family you need to be able to free up a comfortable room in your home, preferably with space to study and a TV/DVD player and maybe internet access. A host family need to be educated to speak good English and open to influences from other cultures. After all, the au pair is here on a cultural exchange.

But when it comes to saving money, you may find that hosting an au pair can not only be affordable on a weekly basis, as pocket money starts from £70 for after school care (regardless of the number of children) for up to 25 hours per week, there may also be a few extra savings and you may get ‘more than you bargained for’ in a pleasant way.

Many European families live on a smaller weekly budget than British families and are more careful with resources. More food is home made from scratch, which is not only cheaper than microwave meals, it is much healthier too. In Europe, most families recycle more than the average family in Britain. (source Friends of the Earth www.foe.co.uk). In the Netherlands, many people cycle when making short journeys, again saving money and increasing family fitness at the same time.

Also, as your au pair will not just care for younger children but also can be a great asset when it comes to helping with homework for school age children. Rather than expensive after school facilities, many educated au pairs are well placed to help with school work and enjoy doing so, as it is a good way to improve their language skills through interaction with children. We find that many of our au pairs go on to a career in teaching.

The vast majority of au pairs that we place at smartaupairs are of graduate calibre and their year as an au pair is often chosen at some time during their studies or sometimes even after they graduate. Our Geman au pairs for example always have at least achieved their ‘arbitur’ (the equivalent to A-levels) and already speak good English. Many are very serious about learning and are happy to share this with your children.

Many au pairs can also save money when it comes to hobbies, such as for example playing a musical instrument. Although they may not be able to replace lessons, choosing a musical au pair means that expensive music practice lessons can be reduced to once weekly and further practice can be done at home with the au pair.

Au pairs can also save when helping you with light housework; rather than using the tumble dryer in a hurry to get out the door, your au pair can put your washing out on the line before walking the kids to school. She can help making home made sandwiches for lunch for you rather than then pre-packed and involving the children to do so as an ‘afternoon project’ means the children can make a positive contribution also.

Cooking ‘British fare’ from scratch is not usually difficult and using local produce means cheaper meals (and healthy AND low on food miles!!) Children and au pair can find recipes online that are easy to follow and fun to cook together. Again, the au pair can improve language skills through reading the recipe and finding out about British food and culture in the process. Baked beans are a great product to use, cheap and healthy and most kids like it, SOOO British!

And finally, having asked some of my au pairs for suggestions on affordable fun with children, I have been able to come up with quite a list;

Indoors – No expensive material needed!

•    Junk modelling, using recycled material to make fun art,anything from simple use of cereal boxes, paper mache, pasta on a string, filling a plastic bottle with rice to make a musical instruments, etc.
•    Singing! Super simple and great fun. Why not prepare for a Friday night show for the parents!
•    Dancing, drama etc. as per singing above.
•    Dressing up, recycle old clothes and hats for an afternoon of fashion police; cat walk optional…….
•    Colouring, painting, cutting, sticking, use magazines and newspapers rather than expensive new paper
•    Reading
+ visit to local library
•    Writing, why not let your kids write a short story about the best place they have ever visited or where they would like to go on holiday and use a travel brochure for the best pictures, better still, let them write their own travel brochure.
•    Cooking, think simple rice crispy cakes, pancakes, milkshakes, pizza, fruitsalad.

Outdoors

• Hide and seek with small toys, on person to hide a number of objects in the garden or the park and the others to find. Scoring and stop watch optional.
• Any kind of ballgames, from football to cricket, why not fill a couple of plastic bottles with water and play ‘ten-pin-bowling’
• Design a treasure hunt around the local area
• Picnic in the park, even the most boring sandwiches can be exciting this way.
• Feeding the ducks
• Walk the neighbours’ dog
• Playgrounds
• Gardening
• Pick-your-own, find out about nearby fruit growers and pick for your own family and maybe have a fruit stall for the day in your front garden (or maybe make jam)

I wish I had seen this impressive list before:
www.destroydebt.com

If your family have any other great examples of savings made or suggested by their au pair, we are really interested to hear from you and share your ideas with other families looking to enjoy cultural childcare even more.

Photo Source:blueelctricaltape/Deviantart

Special Needs Children

When we are asked if we can help find an au pair for a family who have a child with special needs, we generally take the following approach.

We place au pairs with a number of families who have a child with special needs, here are some of the suggestions we give to families.

First of all, do NOT expect experience with special needs! We expect an au pair to be willing to look after a child with special needs, rather than ‘able’ at time of application. It is up to the host family to give as much help and guidance at the start of the placement. It is very important that the family give as much information as possible in advance about

1) the actual child and their special needs
2) the duties the au pair has to take on with regards to this child specifically
3) how much of this is ‘sole care’ and how much of it is supported by a parent or other carers (special school etc).

If at all possible, the family should consider the au pair to start with the care for the able children in the family first of all, giving mum a chance to focus on the child with special needs and gradually increasing responsibilities for the au pair to care for the child with special needs.